I clench my jaw
And grind my teeth
So much so I have flattened my fangs
I use my useless teeth
To gnaw and bite my fingernails
So much so I begin to bleed
ANd I've lost my claws
My wrists are weak
My arms are weak
My hands are clumsy
And my fingers don't know the way to curl
to form a fist
My legs do not move the way I want them to
They are clumsy and uncoordinated
I am forced to inhabit this small weak body
A body that lacks any power
With a voice that struggles to make a
single
sound.
And yet I am filled and overwhelmed with all my wrath and anger.
I fight and squirm and scratch and gnash my teeth all uselessly
Like a beetle stuck on its back
Or a rat quickly bleeding out in a corner
Because I know no other way to be taken seriously
Than to fight
And make them scared of me
I am very scared of them.